Top 10 most ridiculous excuses for skipping work - Spokane, North Idaho News & Weather KHQ.com

Top 10 most ridiculous excuses for skipping work

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Having Former SNL actor Chris Kattan as the picture on this story makes about as much sense as some of the excuses people gave for skipping work Having Former SNL actor Chris Kattan as the picture on this story makes about as much sense as some of the excuses people gave for skipping work
KHQ.com -

Why is former Saturday Night Live actor Chris Kattan's picture attached to this story? Because it makes about as much sense as some of these excuses people gave for skipping work. 

We've all played hooky from work before right? Yeah, me neither bosses who are reading this right now. I would never do that. But there are people who do. There is the common excuse of conveniently being sick on an 88 degree sunny day in July, but then there are those who think outside the box. 

For the last 10 years, CareerBuilder.com has put out a list it calls "The Most Unbelievable Excuses for Calling in Sick." And this year's list is pretty good. The thing is, when you read these excuses, you have to think, "They've got to be telling the truth, right? You can make this up? Who would?" Or maybe because they are so outlandish, they might be legitimate. At any rate, this year's list includes:

1.) I just put a casserole in the oven (Well, you can't just leave it can you? It will burn and possibly start a fire, then my house will be destroyed and the fire department will be called out to put that out, when they could be doing something better and then I'll be forced to go live with my mother, who will just make the exact same casserole I was trying to make but better and then rub it in my face because she made it without burning down the house!)

2.) My plastic surgery needed some "tweaking" to get it just right. (Can you call in sick from The Kardashians Kris?)

3.) I was sitting in the bathroom and my feet and legs fell asleep. When I stood up, I fell and broke my ankle. (The unfortunate byproduct of "Taco Tuesday": "Legs fall asleep on the toilet Wednesday")

4.) I was at the casino all weekend and still had money left to play with on Monday morning. (In the (PG-edited) words of Bull Durham's Crash Davis: "Never *mess* with a winning streak.")

5.) I woke up in a good mood and didn't want to ruin it. (Probably the most honest answer on this list)

6.) I had a "lucky night" and didn't know where I was. (Perhaps this goes hand-in-hand with the casino night?)

7.) I got stuck in the blood pressure machine at the grocery store and couldn't get out. (This one should be easy to prove or disprove, because let's face it, if this really happened, the story would be all over Twitter as gawkers spread your unfortunate scenario all over social media. True documentarians those social media folk.) 

8.) I had a gall stone I wanted to heal holistically. (Who has time for work and Western medicine when you have crystalline concretion sitting within your gallbladder by accretion of bile components?)

9.) I caught my uniform on fire by putting it in the microwave to dry. (The oven works better. Sure it's a little slower, but you have more time to monitor it to properly to ensure a nice even dry)

and finally...

10.) I accidentally got on a plane. (Only acceptable if there are snakes on said plane and you have to help an FBI agent who is transporting a federally protected witness against the mob take out the snakes before they kill everyone on board. Otherwise, it's a total lie.)

So the next time you call in sick when you really aren't, let these crazy excuses inspire you to get a little more creative. The more ridiculous the better. But remember, I'm not telling you to, because I never would. Bad idea. Go to work like you're suppose to. It's fun. Only use those sick days for when you're actually sick. 

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